You don’t have a choice. You should tell them.
It is an honorable decision if you choose to share this information with your partner, which indicates you care about their health and your relationship with them.
Here are some simple steps for tackling this:
- Decide when to tell them. It is best to do it when you’re both in a good mood and probably well in advance to having sex rather than telling them immediately before.
- Learn as much as you can about the STD. Be ready to answer their questions as best you can, such as how it is treated and how you plan to protect them from contracting it.
- Tell them in person, not over text or phone. There is too much room for miscommunication when you can’t speak about an important topic face to face.
- Make it a normal part of the conversation you would have about safe sex. For instance, “I really care about you and want to make sure we use condoms (and birth control). It’s also really important to me because I’ve been diagnosed with [name of STD] and want to protect you. I’m getting it treated with [information here].”
- Listen to your partner without being defensive. It is OK if they express disappointment, but recognize that telling them will build trust and intimacy in your relationship.